If you're not already reading the posts written by the Compassion bloggers, just what are you waiting for?
Start here. [My favorite post so far.]
And here. [I was especially touched by Melissa's words regarding sponsors at the end of this particular post.]
I'd love to hear from some of you who have a system in place for writing your sponsored child(ren). How often do you do this? Do you do it as a family? When do you do it? I need to set a time and make that happen.
Five things: in practice
One of the things Kendra noted regarding her own list of five things really struck a chord with me. In Part 2 of her series, she writes: "...what was most important for me at the time was the ability to dismiss all of the things that don’t fall under those categories."
My list of five things was very timely. A couple days after I had made my own list, we went to small group. [A little bit of information, here: Our small group is made up of several families, and we all take turns in hosting, leading, bringing snacks and supervising the children each week.]
A sign up sheet made its way around the room on this particular evening, and I had the following thoughts:
-We haven't been doing any hosting/leading/snacks/supervising kids since Audra has been born.
-Everyone else (specifically, two families) have been shouldering most of the load.
-I should try to fill up a bunch of these open slots.
The sign up sheet covered the next five weeks. I promptly signed us up to host, twice. Lead, once. Bring snacks, twice. Supervise the kids, once.
I didn't think another thing of it until the following morning, when I was filling in all those new responsibilities on our calendar and burst into tears as I did so. All of a sudden I felt completely overwhelmed with all I'd taken on to do, and sort of went into panic mode.
By the time Mark came home for lunch that day, I was slightly hysterical.
Tearfully, I launched into: "Seriously: what on earth was I thinking? I can't do all of that. I can barely do the very basics at this season in our lives- and, quite frankly, I don't think I'm doing it well- let alone signing up for extra! I can hardly manage to get dinner on the table each night, let alone get dinner on the table AND clean the entire house for company AND make dessert!
...I need you to be my advocate/gatekeeper/buffer [insert appropriate word, here. I'm sure I used them all] and say a resounding "no" when I do things like this... because you're logical and make carefully-thought-out decisions and I'm just, not. And don't."
More crying.
At a bewildered, but patiently listening Mark. [Truthfully, I'm not entirely sure he had the slightest idea what I was even talking about at this point.]
I finally finished with an emphatic: "And NONE of these things are even ON my list-of-five-things! These things aren't even remotely my priorities right now!"
What I know about myself is this: I'm a pleaser. I like to say yes when people ask if I can do something- especially service-oriented things. I may regret it and/or grumble about it later, but in that moment of asking, I say yes. I'm also a very can-do type person. I can do that! Sure, I can fit that in! No problem. And yet, sometimes even if something can be squeezed in, it shouldn't be, for the sake of my sanity and overall peace in our home.
I also know that this is a difficult season in our lives, with our two youngest (heck, they're all young, every one of them!) in addition to one of our boys who has some challenging special needs. There will be times in our lives where these types of "extras" won't throw me into a weepy mess, I know that. But that time is not yet here.
So. Mark, being the wonderful husband that he is, called our small group leader-person the very next day and informed him that "all those slots Stacy filled in? Erase our names." [He gave a little more explanation than that, but he got the job done.]
Then when we showed up at small group the following week, Mark shared that we had signed up, but have since taken our names off the list (Except for a snack spot. Because we can buy something at the store and that's do-able). He said that we felt bad about it because we knew it created more work for everyone else, and we also knew that they had all already been shouldering the load for awhile, and while we *want* to, it is simply not the best season for us to be taking on more. (To which everyone nodded vigorously, because it's quite apparent to everyone who spends any amount of time with us that we have our hands full. :)) He asked that they would be patient with us, and carry more of the load now and we will be able to carry more sometime in the future. (And because they are our friends and love us, they were completely understanding and said of course that was fine.)
All that to say that I was thankful that I had made my list a few days before. [Yes, I'm a little slow on the uptake and should have maybe considered my list of priorities BEFORE signing up, but I'm learning.]
Now if I can just stay away from any and all sign-up sheets.
My list of five things was very timely. A couple days after I had made my own list, we went to small group. [A little bit of information, here: Our small group is made up of several families, and we all take turns in hosting, leading, bringing snacks and supervising the children each week.]
A sign up sheet made its way around the room on this particular evening, and I had the following thoughts:
-We haven't been doing any hosting/leading/snacks/supervising kids since Audra has been born.
-Everyone else (specifically, two families) have been shouldering most of the load.
-I should try to fill up a bunch of these open slots.
The sign up sheet covered the next five weeks. I promptly signed us up to host, twice. Lead, once. Bring snacks, twice. Supervise the kids, once.
I didn't think another thing of it until the following morning, when I was filling in all those new responsibilities on our calendar and burst into tears as I did so. All of a sudden I felt completely overwhelmed with all I'd taken on to do, and sort of went into panic mode.
By the time Mark came home for lunch that day, I was slightly hysterical.
Tearfully, I launched into: "Seriously: what on earth was I thinking? I can't do all of that. I can barely do the very basics at this season in our lives- and, quite frankly, I don't think I'm doing it well- let alone signing up for extra! I can hardly manage to get dinner on the table each night, let alone get dinner on the table AND clean the entire house for company AND make dessert!
...I need you to be my advocate/gatekeeper/buffer [insert appropriate word, here. I'm sure I used them all] and say a resounding "no" when I do things like this... because you're logical and make carefully-thought-out decisions and I'm just, not. And don't."
More crying.
At a bewildered, but patiently listening Mark. [Truthfully, I'm not entirely sure he had the slightest idea what I was even talking about at this point.]
I finally finished with an emphatic: "And NONE of these things are even ON my list-of-five-things! These things aren't even remotely my priorities right now!"
What I know about myself is this: I'm a pleaser. I like to say yes when people ask if I can do something- especially service-oriented things. I may regret it and/or grumble about it later, but in that moment of asking, I say yes. I'm also a very can-do type person. I can do that! Sure, I can fit that in! No problem. And yet, sometimes even if something can be squeezed in, it shouldn't be, for the sake of my sanity and overall peace in our home.
I also know that this is a difficult season in our lives, with our two youngest (heck, they're all young, every one of them!) in addition to one of our boys who has some challenging special needs. There will be times in our lives where these types of "extras" won't throw me into a weepy mess, I know that. But that time is not yet here.
So. Mark, being the wonderful husband that he is, called our small group leader-person the very next day and informed him that "all those slots Stacy filled in? Erase our names." [He gave a little more explanation than that, but he got the job done.]
Then when we showed up at small group the following week, Mark shared that we had signed up, but have since taken our names off the list (Except for a snack spot. Because we can buy something at the store and that's do-able). He said that we felt bad about it because we knew it created more work for everyone else, and we also knew that they had all already been shouldering the load for awhile, and while we *want* to, it is simply not the best season for us to be taking on more. (To which everyone nodded vigorously, because it's quite apparent to everyone who spends any amount of time with us that we have our hands full. :)) He asked that they would be patient with us, and carry more of the load now and we will be able to carry more sometime in the future. (And because they are our friends and love us, they were completely understanding and said of course that was fine.)
All that to say that I was thankful that I had made my list a few days before. [Yes, I'm a little slow on the uptake and should have maybe considered my list of priorities BEFORE signing up, but I'm learning.]
Now if I can just stay away from any and all sign-up sheets.
Five things
I already mentioned that I enjoyed Kendra's series on Drowning in Home Management. In Part 1, she encouraged us to identify our top five "non-negotiables".
I prayed, journaled, and asked Mark his opinion. And I came up with five things. Here they are:
-love God
-love Mark
-love our children
-feed my family
-take care of our home
Pretty general, I know. So I made notes under each one, specifying some ideas of what each of these things might entail. These lists don't cover everything under each category, they're just the first things that came to mind.
Love God
read the Bible
memorize scripture
pray
journal
obedience
Love Mark
greet him when he comes home
pray for him
listen when he speaks
intimacy
encourage him (verbally and in notes/cards)
feed him (desserts)
Love our children
discipline them
daily memory work
homeschool them
read aloud every day
encourage them
pray for them
clothe them
Feed my family
three meals a day
nurse Audra :)
make meal plans
make shopping lists
go grocery shopping
Take care of our home
laundry
clean and tidy rooms
budget/finances/pay bills
decorating~ making our home warm and inviting
In my next post I'll tell you how this activity came in handy this past week, when I took on a little more than I could handle.
I prayed, journaled, and asked Mark his opinion. And I came up with five things. Here they are:
-love God
-love Mark
-love our children
-feed my family
-take care of our home
Pretty general, I know. So I made notes under each one, specifying some ideas of what each of these things might entail. These lists don't cover everything under each category, they're just the first things that came to mind.
Love God
read the Bible
memorize scripture
pray
journal
obedience
Love Mark
greet him when he comes home
pray for him
listen when he speaks
intimacy
encourage him (verbally and in notes/cards)
feed him (desserts)
Love our children
discipline them
daily memory work
homeschool them
read aloud every day
encourage them
pray for them
clothe them
Feed my family
three meals a day
nurse Audra :)
make meal plans
make shopping lists
go grocery shopping
Take care of our home
laundry
clean and tidy rooms
budget/finances/pay bills
decorating~ making our home warm and inviting
In my next post I'll tell you how this activity came in handy this past week, when I took on a little more than I could handle.
Update #3
My mom is home from the hospital. She is so happy to be home.
The doctors never really figured out what was going on. They found inflammation in areas of her stomach lining, swelling and inflammation in her colon. It seems that she picked up some sort of bug/infection, but the when or the what or the how of it remains unanswered.
Nonetheless, her pain is much better.
She's still on a liquid diet, as food is what seems to bring on the pain/cramping. The doctor has told her to sort of ease back in to eating by way of trial and error.
So, we're praying that God would bring complete healing to her body; that He would remove all infection and pain and that she would be able to eat a hearty meal soon!
Thank you, each one of you, who took the time to pray for my mom.
The doctors never really figured out what was going on. They found inflammation in areas of her stomach lining, swelling and inflammation in her colon. It seems that she picked up some sort of bug/infection, but the when or the what or the how of it remains unanswered.
Nonetheless, her pain is much better.
She's still on a liquid diet, as food is what seems to bring on the pain/cramping. The doctor has told her to sort of ease back in to eating by way of trial and error.
So, we're praying that God would bring complete healing to her body; that He would remove all infection and pain and that she would be able to eat a hearty meal soon!
Thank you, each one of you, who took the time to pray for my mom.
Feeding the ducks
Today was Mark's day off, and we decided we should get out and do something fun with the kids. He suggested that we head to the lake and feed the ducks. I thought that was a grand idea, since Adelia is at that fun stage of loving all animals and practicing their sounds, and she's never fed the ducks before.
So we picked up some cheap bread, drove to the lake, and fed the ducks.
Adelia thought that was the greatest thing since sliced bread because, well, there was sliced bread.
She really barely noticed the fact that there were ducks there. She was simply thrilled that we handed her a slice of bread and she got to snack while we did whatever it was we were doing.
It totally cracked me up.
So we picked up some cheap bread, drove to the lake, and fed the ducks.
Adelia thought that was the greatest thing since sliced bread because, well, there was sliced bread.
She really barely noticed the fact that there were ducks there. She was simply thrilled that we handed her a slice of bread and she got to snack while we did whatever it was we were doing.
It totally cracked me up.
Update #2 and Our day
The endoscopy took place last night, and the doctor discovered an area of inflammation in her stomach lining. His thought is that she picked up some parasite or something while she was in Haiti at the end of March. (My dad is a campus pastor with Chi Alpha. He and my mom (and my little brother) went with a team of students on a missions trip in Haiti this past month.) This is something we had wondered about- the parasite possibility- but the endoscopy seems to support that.
The doctor took a biopsy of that area and they are still waiting to get the results back. Now to find out exactly what it is, so that it can be effectively treated.
So. Good news in that the doctor is pretty sure that that is what we're dealing with. And just knowing- versus the not-knowing is a huge relief to mom (and the rest of us). Also, this seems to rule out any of the more serious things we were fearing.
Mom was in good spirits last night and she looked much better. Thank you for your prayers. I'll continue to update you.
I'm working on a post listing my five things- based on this post of Kendra's. I'll try to get that up in the next day or two.
Spring has finally arrived here in the northwest, and we are thankful. Our cherry trees are in full bloom, and when a breeze hits them, all those little pink petals flutter to the ground like it's snowing. I love that. The tulips along our walk are standing tall, the grass is freshly mowed, the sun shines. It is supposed to be a balmy 64 degrees here, today. The kids have been outside a lot, enjoying the warm weather.
My goals today are as follows:
-get the living room tidied (and enlist the kids to help)
-get a load of laundry washed and then hung out on the line to dry
-fold and put away the clean laundry that is piling up (and enlist the kids to help)
-make dinner
-when Mark is home for lunch, take all the kids up to visit mom at the hospital. Ella came with me on Sunday, but I've gone alone or with Audra for my other visits, and the other kids have not seen her yet. (Plus- the window of mom's room overlooks the hospital's helicopter, so I know the boys, especially, will be excited about that.)
-get myself some coffee
Those things, along with loving and caring for my children, nursing my beautiful Audra, and handling all discipline/instruction throughout the day, ought to keep this mama pretty busy for the rest of the day.
I'm sneaking in a picture of Audra, here- taken about a week ago. It's now 7:45, and I'm off to get a shower in before Adelia wakes up (she's a sleepyhead this morning!)
Wishing all of you a delightful day!
The doctor took a biopsy of that area and they are still waiting to get the results back. Now to find out exactly what it is, so that it can be effectively treated.
So. Good news in that the doctor is pretty sure that that is what we're dealing with. And just knowing- versus the not-knowing is a huge relief to mom (and the rest of us). Also, this seems to rule out any of the more serious things we were fearing.
Mom was in good spirits last night and she looked much better. Thank you for your prayers. I'll continue to update you.
I'm working on a post listing my five things- based on this post of Kendra's. I'll try to get that up in the next day or two.
Spring has finally arrived here in the northwest, and we are thankful. Our cherry trees are in full bloom, and when a breeze hits them, all those little pink petals flutter to the ground like it's snowing. I love that. The tulips along our walk are standing tall, the grass is freshly mowed, the sun shines. It is supposed to be a balmy 64 degrees here, today. The kids have been outside a lot, enjoying the warm weather.
My goals today are as follows:
-get the living room tidied (and enlist the kids to help)
-get a load of laundry washed and then hung out on the line to dry
-fold and put away the clean laundry that is piling up (and enlist the kids to help)
-make dinner
-when Mark is home for lunch, take all the kids up to visit mom at the hospital. Ella came with me on Sunday, but I've gone alone or with Audra for my other visits, and the other kids have not seen her yet. (Plus- the window of mom's room overlooks the hospital's helicopter, so I know the boys, especially, will be excited about that.)
-get myself some coffee
Those things, along with loving and caring for my children, nursing my beautiful Audra, and handling all discipline/instruction throughout the day, ought to keep this mama pretty busy for the rest of the day.
I'm sneaking in a picture of Audra, here- taken about a week ago. It's now 7:45, and I'm off to get a shower in before Adelia wakes up (she's a sleepyhead this morning!)
Wishing all of you a delightful day!
My mom: an update
I wanted to give you an update- not that there is much of one- and also, take the time to thank you for praying. I realize that I didn't even give you my mom's name in my last post. Not that God needs her name- obviously He knows that- but I like to pray for people by name, so in case you do, too: Shirley is her name. :)
Audra and I spent some time with mom this afternoon. First of all, a PRAISE:
-When I saw her, she hadn't had any pain medication since the middle of the night. (Thank you, God!) However, during my visit her head was aching so badly and the nausea was returning, so they did give her something for the pain. Still, though- that was several hours where the pain wasn't so bad she felt she needed something for it, so I think we can call that an answer to prayer.
She saw the specialist this morning and he, too, is puzzled. They simply don't know what it is. They keep telling her, "It's a mystery. We're just not sure." She was pretty discouraged this morning, as he told her they wanted to do a colonoscopy and an endoscopy- but that they couldn't do either until tomorrow. Discouraged because tomorrow = one more night in the hospital, and it is hard to not have any answers at this point.
After meeting again with the radiologist, the specialist has now decided to proceed with just the endoscopy- and will try to do so sometime this evening, so that they can take a closer look at her stomach.
So the main prayer request is just that the doctors would be able to determine what is causing this pain.
Thank you so much for your prayers and concern. I am so grateful to know so many are praying, and I will keep you posted if we find anything else out.
Audra and I spent some time with mom this afternoon. First of all, a PRAISE:
-When I saw her, she hadn't had any pain medication since the middle of the night. (Thank you, God!) However, during my visit her head was aching so badly and the nausea was returning, so they did give her something for the pain. Still, though- that was several hours where the pain wasn't so bad she felt she needed something for it, so I think we can call that an answer to prayer.
She saw the specialist this morning and he, too, is puzzled. They simply don't know what it is. They keep telling her, "It's a mystery. We're just not sure." She was pretty discouraged this morning, as he told her they wanted to do a colonoscopy and an endoscopy- but that they couldn't do either until tomorrow. Discouraged because tomorrow = one more night in the hospital, and it is hard to not have any answers at this point.
After meeting again with the radiologist, the specialist has now decided to proceed with just the endoscopy- and will try to do so sometime this evening, so that they can take a closer look at her stomach.
So the main prayer request is just that the doctors would be able to determine what is causing this pain.
Thank you so much for your prayers and concern. I am so grateful to know so many are praying, and I will keep you posted if we find anything else out.
