September adoption update: Part 1

Since I last updated you at the beginning of August, what we've been doing has involved a lot of waiting. (What we need at this point is a foster care license. Our adoption homestudy is complete, but we need the state to approve us to have foster children in our home. My understanding is that this involves two visits and our social worker will need to write up a report detailing what she learned in those visits. And once we're approved, we'll have a license. And as far as I know, that is the last thing we need before we are able to have children placed in our home.) So. What was I saying? Oh, yeah. What we've been doing is waiting.

I'd call our social worker, leave a message, and... wait.

And then I'd call the our social worker again, leave another message, and...

...wait some more.

Oh, but one time I emailed, and...

...WAITed for an email response. (But never got one.)

And a whole lot more of that same pattern.

Apparently our social worker is a very busy woman. Who doesn't listen to her messages. Or maybe she listens to them but then deletes them? At least that's what I suspected.

Then one happy day I called, spoke to a live person(!), who happened to BE our social worker and we made an appointment.

On the day of the appointment, a Friday afternoon, I cleaned the house, baked some goodies, prepped the kids ("Please be on your best behavior and make sure to look at her *and* speak to her when she asks you a question, okay?"), and...

...we waited.

For about 20 minutes, at which point I started asking Mark (who had taken time off work for this appointment) if he thought I should call to remind her of the appointment? We waited another 10 minutes and then I did call. And left another message.

And we waited.

And we just waited out that next hour because she never did show up. Or call.

Now if you think that I was crabby about this missed appointment, you would be perfectly wrong. (And no, I didn't mistype.) I was not.even.crabby! (Small miracle). I journaled that day: "As for the [insert name of social-worker here] no-show, I just refuse to be low about it. I feel sure that at the end of this curvy road is a baby, maybe two, for our family. I'm willing to wait. I praise You, God. I trust You. I love You. I am Yours, loved by You, cared for by You, held in Your hand. *Sure* of your lovingkindness."

And that was that. I just set my mind not to be cranky about it, and you know what? I really wasn't.

Okay, so I was maybe a teeny bit bothered by the fact that it took her until Monday at 4:00pm to *return* my call, but before I spoke with her I had decided I wouldn't be the least bit gruff or perturbed, because maybe this woman doesn't know Jesus, and presuming she's read our homestudy, she knows that we DO know and love Jesus, and so I wasn't about to put Him in a bad light.

She was apologetic about the scheduling mishap (she'd had us down for another day altogether). And we rescheduled the appointment.

I'll post Part 2 to fill you in on that.


  1. Hi Stacy :) Thank you for the update. All of the waiting you are being challenged with brought to mind one of my very favorite verses in the Bible - it's a treasure that the Father showed me, and it's one I hold very close.

    Psalm 130:5-6 It says, “I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope. My soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchmen wait for the morning.”

    Isn't that lovely? I always thought it would make a gorgeous song :) Love to you! Q

  2. ...which is why we like having our foster licence through Bethany Christian Services... We happen to have a fabulous case worker right now, but in case we didn't we would always have someone at Bethany to talk to and advocate for us. On the subject of waiting, we also waited a long time for a placement, amazingly enough (a year with only two short placements and many "amost placements"). And when we got one (two brothers), it was only to be for a "very short time". A year and half later, plus 5 more siblings later, we know what God had planned for us! Koe

  3. I am proud of you for how you are handling this... waiting...!
    Good job!

  4. Hi Stacy;

    Waiting for part two, but wondering if you should call a supervisor to just check. Sometimes I have found it helps to get things moving-not that you want to get anyone in trouble, but it is there job to find homes for these kids (and lets remember who DOESN'T want these children to be placed in loving Christian homes- and (hint)it is not "the foster care system" that I am referring to.)

    After we adopted our 3rd daughter (princess sunshine) from foster care, the social worker we worked with never reentered our name into the system- I called her and called her.... (an you get the picture) ...well a year an a half later we 'left' to do an adoption to Guatemala- we were totally frustrated with our state's system of care. We then talked with a supervisor, who told us the worker didn't do her job and this is why we never got calls. In hindsight now I know it was God keeping us from anything that would prevent us from adopting our 3 wee one's...but still- sometimes it is an overburdened social worker, who just isn't doing their job.

    And I am not an "in your face" type, I am patient (normally) and kind...but I can get really angry when I think someone isn't helping these kids into a family who is waiting.

    I hope this isn't taken the wrong way, I do feel like this is HOlY Anger- for who will stand in the gap for those who can't defend themselves and will raise up a godly generation ?

    off my pulpit...

    Kimmie ;-)
    mama to 6
    one homemade and 5 adopted (4 through foster care)

  5. ((Stacy))
    Thanks for the update... I've been wondering where you were in the whole process.
    Praise the Lord that He enabled you to remain calm and not become cranky about it! I'm sure you are being used as a testimony to many during this time.
    Looking forward to reading Part 2...

    Lamentations 3:25
    The Lord is good to those who wait for Him;
    To the soul who seeks Him.

    Praying for you!!

  6. I'm proud of you too for how you are handling this. What a great example to others and to your children.

    I'm looking forward to hearing more about this journey.

  7. When we began our adoption journey (2001) we waited SIX MONTHS with our paperwork COMPLETED on the state caseworkers desk. And made no progress. So we grabbed our paperwork, and went to Bethany. I feel your pain :)

  8. I am grateful to have another update - I will update my site as well with your story. Still praying for all desires to be fulfilled... :)

  9. Stacy?
    You live it.
    I will always remember your journal entry here: such PURE, 100% TRUST IN GOD. PERIOD.
    *Sure* of His lovingkindness.


    Have I told you today how much I appreciate you?

    It is a privilege beyond words to learn from this community of women.

    *THANK YOU*.

    All's grace,

  10. I guess I'm gonna be a party pooper-- this is the way every state that I have ever heard of operates (except maybe Kansas and they're privatized). Get used to waiting... waiting...'s a lifestyle for the state.

    You're a better woman than I am :)


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