In the middle of the night

Did any of you read that "In the middle of the night" phrase up there in the subject heading and think of the book Madeline? Okay, maybe it was just me, then. [And for any of you who are puzzled, there's a part of the Madeline book that goes "In the middle of the night, Miss Clavel turned on the light and said, 'Something is not right'..." (or something like that) and just as soon as I typed that, I had the little singsong way we read that book going on in my brain.]

How's that for the most random beginning to a post EVER?

It is, in fact, the middle of the night. Which is why this post is titled as such. I was just up with our foster baby for her first feeding of the night. It's 2:01. And of course, now I am wide awake. Mark is snoring beside me. Even though we were just talking less than one minute ago. That man can fall asleep in one millisecond while I lay here for hours, awake, but trying, to sleep. But I've already mentioned that.

So you get random in-the-middle-of-the-night thoughts from me. I can't promise clarity or any sense of cohesion whatsoever, but I'm up and couldn't find my journal (because it's out in the living room and I don't want to get up to get it), and so here I am.

*I told Mark yesterday that our phone has rung more in the past three weeks than it has rung in the previous YEAR around here. I am hardly joking. 99% of those calls are from a social worker. Not just one social worker, mind you, but dozens of them, calling me for one thing or another because I have a foster child. Every day. Several times a day. There's Bonnie and Bobbie and Gayle and Tracy and Susan and Laura and Linda and Mary and Shelly and Leslie and those are just the ones I can name off the top of my head. (Because those are the ones I've spoken with the most. I've seen all of them, too. Because when they come to pick up our foster baby for her birthmom visits there's a new one at my door every time.) And I've got to say, they are the most disorganized group of women I've ever had the privilege of working with. It is really something. I would like to get my hands on the whole system in general and do a little cleaning up and fine-tuning. But somehow I don't think that's my calling, so I hope someone else will.

*We got to see Addie again yesterday. We packed up the whole family, foster baby included, of course, and drove the few hours it took for us to get to where she is. The kids aren't allowed to go in to see her, so Mark and I took turns in the waiting room. We get one hour. I let Mark go first, out of the kindness of my heart. Which I later regretted because of the fact that during the first half-hour, she was awake! Eyes open, looking around. And as Mark and I traded positions he told me he got to feed her her bottle. (So now you see what I mean about me regretting my kindness in letting him go first?) But when I got in to see her she still needed to finish 30 cc's of formula (Don't ask. The whole cc's thing? I'm confused. Someone enlighten me. That's maybe 2 oz? I could google that and find out for sure for you but I'm lazy. Lazy, just not sleepy.) Anyway, that last bit is the hard part, mind you, when she is zonked out and needing lots of encouragement to eat-- and I did it!!! She ate it all up, but took nearly our entire half-hour doing it. (She's doing a better job with the eating, too, by the way, they told us, so that's an answer to prayer!)

*Mark and I have said several times, but especially on the drive home last night: "We could do what they're doing." Not to undermine their care for her right now because I know they're doing a great job, but I wish they would just discharge her to us already so that we can do what they're doing and be bonding with her in the meantime. But I'm not in charge of that decision. Our prayer, though, is that she would continue to improve and that they will let her come home within the next couple of weeks.

*By the way, thank you all for your sweet comments on the "Introducing..." post. You are so kind. I really do feel like you are all friends. I just haven't had the pleasure of seeing most of you. I wish I could have you all over. Really. Every one of you. I'm just trying to imagine what that would be like and at the moment, all I can think about it what a state my house is in. What with the phone ringing every five seconds and the laundry (I'd forgotten how much more laundry you do when there's a baby in the house. Yikes!) all over the place, I'd have to do a major overhaul if you actually were all coming over. But I would feed you well, I promise, and amidst all the toys and clutter and my kids, we could chat, face to face. Now wouldn't that be fun? But the thing is, I'd want you to bring all of *your* kids, too, so I could meet them, and really there's not that much room in my house so I've got to come up with an alternate meeting place. I love you, and appreciate your comments, and I thank you for your friendship.

*Mark was off this past weekend and encouraged me to take each of our kids on a date. Great idea, and very needed, especially from this one right here:

::on our way out the door, isaac zipping up his jacket::

::mark snapped this photo as we were walking away from the house::

*I keep forgetting to mention this, but for weeks now, we've had crocuses blooming in our front flower beds. BLOOMING! That means SPRING! And our tulips are coming up alongside our front sidewalk. Mark got out for a bit in the garden last week and turned it over to ready it for planting, and I am WAY behind in ordering seeds. I keep meaning to sit down with Mark and the seed catalog (thank you, Rebeca. You recommended this seed catalog and I love it) and map out our garden and then figure out what we want to order and then start some stuff indoors (which I've never done), but that whole idea just hasn't come to fruition, yet. Maybe if my phone would stop ringing. Have I mentioned that my phone rings incessantly?

*What else? I know I had about 50 random thoughts flitting through my brain mere moments ago and now where did they all go? Oh, here's one: Just as soon as I can gather together the ingredients, I am so making this salad. That looks positively scrumptious to me right about now. Except for the fresh ginger part. Usually when I see "fresh ginger" on a recipe I cheat and sprinkle in the ground ginger. I just don't ever BUY fresh ginger. Do you? Am I missing out?

*If you haven't seen this blog, head on over there. It makes me weepy, in a good way. (Thank you, Amy, for steering me to that blog. I love it.)

*Beverly, welcome back from vacation!

*Cindy: have a WONDERFUL vacation!

*Mrs. M, I am praying for you.

Okay, I think that's it. And now that I've unloaded my brain, maybe I'll be able to sleep?

Just as soon as I give Mark a kick. Seriously. The snoring? Ugh. But I love that man, I do. He's the best. He'll even be up for the next nighttime feeding. That's how great he is. I am so blessed.


  1. Wow! Your mind is busy in the middle of the night! I enjoyed reading all of your thoughts :-)

    30 cc is 1 ounce...

    I used to be a NICU nurse, and how well I remember trying to gently force those last few cc's into very sleepy, uninterested babies...

    Yesterday, I kept coming back to look at Addie's pictures... she is just too beautiful for words. I can't wait for the day you get to bring her home. We're praying!

    Love you!

  2. I pray you can bring little Addie home very soon! I'm sure your heart is aching to do so. And the kids, especially Ella, must be so excited. Having the foster baby has been a good time of practice I imagine!
    I would love to come over for another visit! I too, feel like you are a "real" friend! Glad you love the seed catalog. I'm itching to do some gardening too, and not sure how much to try to do this year with a new baby. But hey, if you can do it so can I! I finally got Animal, Vegetable, Miracle from the library and am enjoying it. And fresh ginger? Yes, you're missing out. Buy a chunk next time you're at the grocery store. It's worlds better than the powdered stuff. (In my humble opinion!) That salad does look super yummy. I shall have to try it too.
    And I bought something for Addie. Can we have a cyber baby shower for you? :> I'm just so excited that God is placing her in your family.
    Okay, now that I've left a "short" comment, I'll sign off.
    Bless you my friend!

  3. heh heh. This post sounded all too familiar after the one I wrote last night. And, I was so happy to read it because I realized that, while I felt a little dumb posting all my randomness, I read yours and loved it. It was real, and funny and full of lots of thoughts. I like that.

    And, I don't think I've mentioned how full of joy we are for you and this new one God is giving you. And she is so beautiful. Can't wait to meet little Adelia! Seriously, too, I had just told Justin that I liked that name but didn't think I could ever use it 'cause then we'd have two girls that start with an 'a' and end with an 'a'. So I'm so glad you can! And for such a sweetie.

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  5. Stacy,

    Thank you for praying for makes it all the more special becasue you have so much on your own plate right now. It is so funny how people you have never met can become your friends :o)

    Continuing to pray for Addie to eat well and come home soon.

  6. Hi Stacy :) I love that pic of you and your sweetie walking down the pathway!

    This post was a delight - hope that you did sleep some and that today has been a joyful one so far.
    Love, Q

  7. Stacy,
    I loved your post! Lots of fun tidbits-- it was like an actual conversation! =)
    A cc is the same as a ml, so 30 cc is the same as 30 ml or 1 ounce. (a.k.a. 20 calories in formular or breastmilk.)
    Crocuses! I am so jealous! (In a good way, I promise.)
    And thanks again for the Animal Vegetable Miracle recommendation-- I can't put it down!

  8. Hee hee, I like it when you blog at 2 a.m. (Although I suppose it wouldn't be kind to wish more sleepless nights on you.)

    Sooo...if we all come over to your house will you make us that salad? It looks SO good.

  9. What a cute photo of you and your little man.

    I'm often up at 2am, but only because I haven't gone to bed yet. I am such a night owl. Such a character flaw.

    Hope little Addie puts on weight soon so you can bring her home.

  10. It's funny. I had just started a post like this yesterday morning computer got sick! I had to go ALL day today without a computer!!! My sweet husband fixed it tonight (I was so impressed that he knew what he was doing because it was a video card? that needed to be replaced?...who knew.) Anyway. I feel now that random posts are good if you do them, then publish right away. Now it is old news about our weekend and the world will never read of it. :)

    I WISH the social workers would call more. I NEVER hear anything unless I call them. It is frusterating because I took her to the doctor (that she has been going to since birth) and the nurse there told me more than SS EVER has! I was so thankful to her. AND about the DISorganization...don't even get me started. I mean, I can imagine it is a difficult job but...I'll stop there. They are always very nice. (Had to add something positive.)

    I wish sometimes too, that I could meet all my bloggy friends! I want to hold your sweet little baby! How awesome that you got to feed her. I bet your daughter is dying to get her hands on her.

    Praying for you often. Hope you get a better night sleep! I am like your hubby...I can be asleep in a half a second. Sometimes I don't even remember getting into bed.

    Sorry for rambling! :) I haven't had computer all day. hehe

  11. Get some sleep already! That's what I'm prayin' for ya.

    Ginger. We keep it in the freezer. (It molds quickly in the fridge and drys out on the counter). Then grate or cut what you need and put the rest back in the freezer. And YES you are missing out!

  12. hope little Addie continues to improve so that she can join you all in your home.

  13. I'm afraid I only thought of Billy Joel, not Madeline... In the middle of the ni-i-ight... And now that song is really stuck in my head, thanks. :)

    Love reading all of your thoughts here- some of our best thinking and planning can be done during those night hours when sleep won't come- and what good use it is! Praying for you, friend. (((Stacy)))

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  15. I LOVED this post. Can you believe that on vacation, the only regret I had about not being online was that I was missing whatever was going on with your foster care/adoption journey? Its true.
    And my darling hubby gets some swift kicks in the middle of the night for snoring :-) Also - you post the yummiest recipes!! I want to hold Addie!!! I am already loving her. {{{hugs}}}


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