Adoption: Part Five

*2006 post*

If you're reading for the first time, you might want to start at the beginning of the story.

Then began the most difficult part of the wait. We had met our little boy and then left him. Now we had to wait for all the paperwork to be processed in Guatemala until we had the okay to come back and get him. This is a long process and such a struggle.

I carried an ache around for months. I truly felt like he was missing from our family. A couple of times I actually counted heads- to make sure we were all there; and then it would hit me: Isaias. He’s missing.

It was months of waiting to get to that next step that would bring us that much closer to bringing him home. But there were of course delays, disappointments, and frustrations. (Each day was one day longer than I would have liked!) But God was busy doing lots in my heart in regards to trusting Him. A journal entry during those months:

God, I trust you completely, but it is difficult for me to relinquish the control I’d like to have in this process. (How foolish am I even to write that? It looks so ridiculous.) As if I could possibly control things better than You, Almighty God. Please forgive me for my pride, for my desire to be in charge, to try to- or want to- control the steps, the outcome, and the timing of this process. (As if I could!) Increase my faith, my trust in You. I know Isaias is in your hands, that You are faithful, that Your timing is right and perfect, and that You are in control. May I submit to You, to Your plans, Your desires, joyfully and faithfully.

So we prayed a lot, waited a lot, and cried a lot (or at least, I did!) Isaias turned 4 months old. Then 5 months old. Then 6, 7, and 8 months old. We got new pictures, a progress report (height, weight, etc) and a short DVD each month. We would crowd around the TV and I would weep at the sight of him. Watching him grow up like that- so far away from us- was very, very difficult.

In October I journaled this:

I am sad today. We got Isaias’ progress report today and I am sad. His pictures make me cry. He is sitting up now, he has his two bottom teeth already. He’s just getting so old, so big, and I long for him to come home, to be home with us…

As sad as we were, we knew he was being cared for, he was healthy, warm, and well-fed. And ultimately we knew he was in God’s hands.

Finally we got a call from our agency saying that we were out of the PGN; and that within the next 4-6 weeks we could come and get him! So, the kids and I made a paper chain, one link for each day of the 6 weeks, and began counting down. One night I realized that we were down to a few more links (and not leaving anytime soon), so I added more links for the kids to pull off (they never noticed, but it ended up being over 8 weeks, not 4-6).

In early December we got a call saying that our US Embassy appointment, the final step (!) (in Guatemala) was a mere 6 days away. We flew out 3 days later, arrived in Guatemala late that night, and were scheduled to go to Hannah’s Hope first thing the following morning to go pick up our Isaias.

As I sat in the hotel that morning, waiting for the driver to come and get us, so that we could go to HH and get Isaias, I journaled this:

This song has been running through my head all morning: "I will exalt You, oh Lord… Praise Your holy name, that my heart may sing to You… I will exalt You, oh Lord." My heart is singing to You. Thank you! God, You are *so* good!

As we walked into HH, I scanned the room for our Isaias. Our now 9-month-old boy. It had been 6 months since we saw him last. I peeked around the corner, and I saw him- sitting up like such a big boy in his high chair, having lunch. I burst into tears and went to him but he was still eating so I wasn't able to hold him. I journaled later: "But, oh- to be so close to him, to be able to reach out and touch him and see his cute, cute face- was amazing." Here’s one of the first pictures I took:


Mark had moved in front of him and was talking to him and Isaias was looking at him so intently. He kept checking out his daddy, giving him this curious, sort of amused look. He was so intrigued with this man talking to him!

A few minutes later. Isaias was still a little uncertain, and very sleepy:


It took us only a few minutes to gather his things (we took his stuffed lion, his blanket, his tape recorder, and his photo album (all the things we'd brought down for the first trip)), and he was ready to leave.

I could tell that Isaias was unsettled in my arms- very squirmy and uncomfortable.

It was actually really difficult for me to take him away from everything familiar to him (voices, sights, smells, foods, sounds, and the language). And the Special Mothers there (the caregivers at HH) very obviously love these children and had truly been stand-in mothers to Isaias. His Special Mother stood, weeping, as we gathered him into our arms and took the small bag with his belongings, preparing to go. I was weeping, too. I hugged his Special Mother and let her kiss him one last time.

My emotions at that point were all over the place. I was sorrowful and yet full of joy and relief, too. This was really the culmination of this entire process for us, and yet- such a beginning, too.

When we got back to the hotel room we sat down immediately and prayed for him. We asked God to bless him and help him to transition and bond with us, to give him peace and comfort and help him to feel secure. He was very serious and observant, but not crying or fussy.

Eventually, he fell asleep in my arms as I walked him around. When he woke up he kind of pulled back and checked me out. He touched my face and stared at me. And then he got playful. We played peek-a-boo and he was giggling. Mark got him laughing really hard, and that was fun. He seemed much more relaxed with us. Here he is, later that first day:


We called home and talked to our kids and told them we had their brother with us. I cried at the sound of their voices and of course, couldn't wait to get home...

For the next few days, we spent lots of time with our little Isaias, getting to know him and getting this wonderful time of bonding with him. And we hung out with the another couple (one we had met on our first trip, also picking up their son!) during our time there. We had our Embassy appointment, and were officially approved to take him home with us.

By the end our stay in Guatemala, we really felt like Isaias knew us and felt secure with us (not to mention we were certain that he liked us- he gave us lots of smiles and giggles to prove it.) He had quickly become our little buddy and loved being held by either daddy or mommy.



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To read the next (and final) part of our adoption story, go here.